Thwarted (Easter - Day 30)

(Based on Colossians 3:18-4:18)

About two weeks ago, my friend invited me to go watch The Evil Dead. I'm a big horror buff, and I love a good scary movie. I tend to lean towards the viewpoint of Stephen King, who says, "Monsters are real, and ghosts are real too. They live inside us, and sometimes, they win." Watching scary movies reminds me that at any moment the monster may come out. I've gotta keep him in check. Although the original filming of Evil Dead was a cult classic, and one of the best horror flics of all time, I had done my research on the new one, and wasn't impressed. I knew going into it that it would be a chop 'em and kill 'em sort of movie, all about shock and awe. I wanted to go watch the new Ryan Gosling movie, The Place Beyond the Pines. That one was gonna be good. 

When my friend invited me, I had all this information in front of me from people who had already seen the movie, and it wasn't looking good. My instincts told me to not waste my money. My friend told me it was gonna be gory. What should I do? 

You're probably wondering what in the world going to watch The Evil Dead has to do with a letter to a church in Colosse a very long time ago. In order to find out what was happening in that time, I need to shine a little light on how I normally react in situations in which I already have a plan and someone comes in and infringes on it. I win out. I do whatever it takes to convince the person how my plan is better than theirs, and we end up going to see the movie that I want to see. I imagine that the reason Paul was writing about things like wives submitting to husbands, husbands submitting to wives, children honoring parents, and slaves submitting to masters was, everyone was trying to run the show. 

What really happened in my encounter with my friend was mostly internal. I was in a position to either use my power to persuade, or yield my power to submit. Even with the simplest, most mundane things of life, the though of submitting is yucky. The thought doesn't taste good. It makes me feel like I'm about to be walked on or taken advantage of, and punctures a hole in my heart of self-importance. But, every once in awhile, that night included, I submit. I yield my power, my plans, and my agendas to the desires of another. 

The crazy thing about submission is, it always seems like I'm going to lose something in the end. However, something is nearly always gained. My friend and I had a great time. We enjoyed each other's company, and laughed at all the cheesy scenes where people cut their faces off and shot nails into each other's heads. It was great, but cheesy nonetheless. I left that night thankful that I was able to let go of my all-powerful plans just long enough to find a window of opportunity and say, "Sure. I'll go."

I don't think Paul is talking in this passage about making sure we know where our places are when it comes to social status. I don't think he's trying to tell the wives to understand they're lower than their husbands. I don't think he's telling the husbands they're badasses and should place themselves higher than their wives. He's not telling children that they have no say in anything when it comes to their relationship with parents. He's not telling slaves that they are nothing compared to their masters. He's actually restoring a lost dignity to each group: wives, husbands, children, parents, slaves, and masters. Evidently, all of these "social statuses" had become just that. Everyone was becoming what society told them to be, and they were using their power in ways that promoted social stratification. 

Paul just said in the passage before that because of what Christ did, the words like slave and free, man and female, are meaningless now. Yet, when we choose to use power in ways that projects us physically or mentally above others, we are forgetting what Christ did. We are forgetting that part of the old, dead, and rotten way of life included putting ourselves above other people in our homes, our jobs, and our relationships. What Paul proposes is the idea of submission all across the board. He takes all the social status positions created by society, and puts them all into one category called submission - the yielding of power. 

Now, the relationship between man and wife is defined by how well they yield power to the other. The relationship between the child and parent is defined by how well the child yields its power to the parent through obedience, and how well the parent yields its power to punish. The relationship between the slave and master (or, boss to employee), is defined by how well the employee yields power in following instructions, and how well the boss yields power in punishing mistakes. 

When we wake up to the reality of a new life of freedom, relationships become everything. The closest we can get to experiencing God is experiencing harmonious relationships. I am the king of trying to get my own way, no matter if the relationship is at work or with friends. But what Paul says is that when I try to get my own way, I'm viewing the people in my relationships as position holders and not friends. I'm viewing people as threats to my own power structure instead of thinking about how I can let go of my way, and let someone else have a say for a change. 

Submitting to others means that I am deconstructing the idea of social stratification. Even though on paper there are bosses and employees, CEO's and peons, janitors and presidents, wives and husbands, children and parents, and allies and enemies, we don't don't have to let these social strata define how we interact. Submitting to others means opting out of the bogus world system of worshiping at the feet of the elite, and throwing crumbs to the feet of the poor. When we're asked the question, "Who should we submit to?" the answer is . . . Yes. When we yield power to the people around us, and stop running the show, we're actually killing the system that for too long has deemed who should have the power and who shouldn't. 

One last note before I end this. Submitting is NOT being a doormat. Yielding power takes courage, and there is no courage in being walked all over. Sometimes, yielding power looks like resisting the urge to be taken advantage of. The desire to people please and be a doormat is sometimes more powerful than the desire to say no, and submission works the same there. Submission is about the heart. To the world, yielding power may look like being a robot, but the heart knows where it belongs. It belongs to the source of all power and mercy, love and grace. We know that our power doesn't come from humans, but from the deep, mysterious vitality inside all of us. What that power does when we get our hands on it is either enhance or conquer. The choice is ours.

Today's Action: There will be at least one instance today in which our plans get threatened by somebody else's. It may be about where to go to dinner, what to eat, what movie to watch, what project to work on, or what to do after work. When this happens, we courageously take a step down off our high horses and let the person "threatening" our plans have their way. See what happens!