Uncompromised (Pentecost - Day 10)

(Based on 2 Corinthians 1:12-22)

It was an act of God that I got through yesterday without smoking a cigarette. There were several times, like after I ate dinner last night, that I couldn't imagine not having one. I kept staring at my roommate's pack sitting on the chair, wanting one, thinking about having one, and thinking about saying screw it.

I'm here again, in the 60th hour of not smoking, somehow still making it. By no fanciful program of my own, no spiritual formulas, no special prayer, something or someone has been doing for me what I absolutely can't do for myself right now. I don't have the ability to remove my obsession. That would be the equivalent of giving myself amnesia or erasing my past. All I can do is not smoke. The rest is up to my Higher Power.

Paul is pleased to report that he made it through whatever trouble happened in Asia Province, and that it was because of no fanciful footwork. He says that God gave him the ability to focus on Him. He says that God kept him uncompromised throughout his travels. Because of God, Paul was able to live another day to continue carrying the message of love, forgiveness, salvation, and freedom. Evidently, there's been some rumors going around the audience that Paul doesn't keep his word. Since he told the audience he was planning to visit on his way to Macedonia, but didn't make it, he was wishy-washy and non-committal. Paul defends himself on this, but then uses it to talk about God's promises.

He says that God makes his promises known through Jesus. I don't understand this nor do I want to think about it. He also says that God stamps us with His spirit - an eternal pledge to finish the work he's started. I like this. The spirit inside of us is what Paul calls God's Yes. 

On a digressive note - there was this time after I quit drinking that I was okay with having fun with people who were drinking. That is a part of life for me now - going anywhere with anyone to have fun. Alcohol doesn't have the impact it once had on me. Right now, I can't say the same for cigarettes. Or, it doesn't seem like I can. I can't imagine driving without cigarettes. I can't imagine going to work and taking my break without cigarettes. I can't imagine eating without cigarettes. I need to pray more than I have been. Without prayer, I'm just doing fancy footwork. I'm trying to mold my own non-smoking plan, and I've proven to myself over and over again what it looks like for Jon to quit anything.

Can I trust that life will still be interesting without? Can I trust that God will still be interesting without? Can I trust that cigarettes actually aren't beneficial in any way? Can I believe that there will actually be benefits that come that I can't see right now? Can I believe that there will come a time when I won't be thinking about cigarettes all the time or wanting one all the time? Do I believe that I don't have a solution other than not smoking? Do I believe that God, or Jesus, or the Power of the Universe, or Positive Energy, or The Spirit, or The Creator can do what I can't do (remove the mental obsession I have toward cigarettes)?

Rescue is coming one moment at a time. That's all I have, that's all we have. One moment at a time. Listening to God's Yes whispering inside each of us, may we believe that something bigger than us is drawing us, pulling us forward, restoring us and the world around us. 

It's time to go to work, a day after Memorial Day. What's going to be the action for the day . . .

Today's Action: Pick one "struggle" that we're dealing with in life right now. Have we decided to let ourselves be rescued, or are we still kicking and screaming, or both? As much as we can, as many moments as we can, be grateful for rescue and new life.