1 Samuel 12:1-25
In a state of the union address, Samuel outlines the history of the Israelites. He reminds them of how shortly after their ancestors were delivered from Egyptian oppression, they turned their backs on God. They started worshiping fertility gods and goddesses. When they did this, they found themselves digging their own graves, getting shackled in to the oppression of Moab and the Philistines. But each time, they would hit a bottom and cry out to God. People like Gideon, Barak, and now Samuel showed up on the scene to lead Israel in the right direction.
When the Israelites heard about Nahash, and the way he was gouging out everyone's eyes and coming to attack them, they panicked. For twenty years, they had turned their backs on God and the life-giving ways of life he offered them. They chose to create their own chaos by worshiping the gods of Canaan and the gods of the Philistines. Through creating their own blindness to the free life, they found themselves in a full-fledged panic attack, asking for a king to deliver them.
The king was there among them, leading them. But a king can never change the heart of the people, just like a president can never change the heart of the people. The laws and mandates set forth by a king could never change the hearts of the people.
King or no king, president or no president, Samuel told the people that if they wanted to be free they had to confess their shortcomings and turn back to God.
One of the greatest challenges as an alcoholic is having enough money. My paychecks would disappear after a few days. I would hardly make a paycheck last a week because of my drinking. In the times that I didn't have a job, it was extremely chaotic. I would have to figure out how to whip out cash to pay my bills, and this meant I would either have to ask for money or take out loans. Taking out loans was my first option. I would take out school loans and never attend classes, using them to sustain my drinking. It was a ferocious cycle that wouldn't end. As soon as I felt like my head was above water, I would panic and go into survival mode once again.
In these times, I asked for a king. I was too scared to face God, and too scared to face my own chaos. It was much easier to put a bandage on the problem. I just needed more money. The problem was strictly financial and had nothing to do with my heart. My conscience told me that if I turned to God, it would be extremely painful and I didn't know what to expect. I would have to take a deep look inside myself, and I wasn't ready to do that. So, I continued the cycle. Different people crossed my path along the way trying to steer me in the right direction, but I didn't listen. I hadn't hit my bottom yet. I had a lot more digging to do.
Samuel is addressing a group of people who have not quite hit their bottom yet. They've asked for a king while avoiding the daunting task of looking inside their hearts to see what's going on.
My problems with taking out loans weren't a financial problem, just like my problems with drinking weren't that I couldn't moderate. My problems stemmed from the condition of my heart. My heart was aching with shame, guilt, and a self will that was out of control.
When self will is the king of the heart, we seek out kings to rule us. Having someone or something rule us looks bad, but at least it prevents us from having to do the hard work of cleaning house and moving on to a more fulfilling life with God.
What's more is, when self will and self-centeredness rule our hearts, we react out of fear when threats come our way. Instead of taking a moment, breathing, praying, and letting God fight for us, we revolt and apply band-aids to the problem. We find that as long as their are band-aids, we don't have to do any deep heart cleansing.
Band-Aids run out unfortunately. They aren't sustainable. Eventually, we realize that the band-aids actually had no medical function. They didn't clean the wounds. They didn't arrogate the infected areas. They didn't treat the problems. They just covered them up. They merely saved us time.
Samuel is asking the Israelites, "What is the condition of your heart? Do you see that getting a king didn't really fix anything?"
I'm convinced that anything and anyone that I depend on other than God has a sure potential of becoming my king. Whether it be family, friends, my ambitions, my job, finances, I am not removed from ignoring the real problem and letting myself be ruled from something or someone.
To tell you the truth though, letting God be my King is the easier, softer way. The burden is much lighter. The life is way easier. My time is spent going with the flow, and not having to be everywhere all at once. Even when I hear of kings gouging out peoples' eyes, or dictators trying to control the population, I don't have to react insanely. I can stop, relax, and remember my deliverance. I can remember that I do have a story full of oppression, but full of rescue as well. It's in these moments of stopping and looking inward - not speeding up and avoiding the inside job - that repentance happens.
Today's Action: What is the biggest "threat" in our lives right now? Are we ignoring the hard work of looking inside to see why we are so threatened, and applying band-aids in the hopes that they'll do the work that only God can do? Or, are we taking a step back from the situation and figuring out how to remove the source of the fear and panic for good?
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