Transient (Day 24 of Lent)

As an American, I connect the idea of slavery with movies like Django Unchained and Lincoln.  I think of the 27 million women and children around the world who are stuck as pawns in the heartless scheme of sex trafficking.  I think of one person oppressing another, or one person oppressing many, like Kony or Hitler.  It's easy to stop there when I think of slavery.  

In John chapter eight, Jesus is talking to some Jews and they don't understand what he means by "the truth will set you free."  The Jews, just like me, were never slaves to anyone.  Judaism came into existence after the Israelites were freed from the oppressive grip of Egypt.  From the time of Egyptian oppression on though, the Israelites created their own form of slavery and oppression.  

Jesus responds to their defense with, "I tell you that anyone who chooses a life of sin chooses a dead-end life, and they, in fact are slaves.  Slaves are transient, and cannot come and go at will.  You say your father was Abraham, but you are secretly plotting to kill me.  If you knew God you would love me because I, just like Abraham, am telling you the truth that God has given me."  

A transient is someone who travels in and out of existence.  They're here one day, and gone another.  They're "alive" one moment and "dead" in the next.  What does slavery really mean if the oppressor is not a person?  

When I get into bed at night, I like to get on the computer and catch up on the day's news, check Facebook, check my emails, and then get onto a website I love.  This website is a free exchange of information, and anyone can post something as long as it follows certain rules.  While there is a ton of interesting information and stories, there is a ton of pornography.  Depending on how "prayed up I am," I am one click away from looking at pictures that fill my mind with fantasy.  In one instant, I can erase everything that is real and true, and delve into an existence that is completely based on sexual pleasure.  It's an existence that invites me into chasing after things that only exist in my mind. There have been times when I've jumped into this existence for hours, scrolling through picture after picture, trying to squeeze out every bit of emotional fantasy that I can possibly attain.  I usually lock the door of my house too, and shut myself in my room.  I have this fear that someone may walk in at any moment if my door's not locked and catch me.  When I choose to live in this existence, I am not free to come and go at will.  I am enslaved.  I am heading down a dead-end street that's lined with beautiful blossoming trees.  I am convinced that I'm going to a place of beauty, but I'm actually being traded off and sold and purchased by the voice of a liar.  

Most days, I enjoy mental, physical, and spiritual freedom.  I have the ability to make decisions and to go and do whatever I want to.  I've been blessed with the ability to pursue my deepest desires, and to stay true to my heart's passions.  I sense a connection with God that drives me.  There's hardly a moment that goes by that I don't believe in God's presence.  In this existence, I'm free.  I'm free to love and to be loved.  When I choose to live in the existence of freedom, I tend to think more about others.  I'm awake to the needs around me.  I notice people.  I listen better.  

Slavery, in the sense that Jesus is talking about, means jumping in and out of two opposing existences:  freedom and bondage.  On the days that I don't give a second thought to needing help from a power greater than myself, I choose bondage.  On the days that I realize that I need help from God, I choose freedom.  "Living a life of sin" does not mean that someone is born with this innate desire to kill people or steal, nor does it mean that freedom is nonexistent.  On the contrary, living a life of freedom does not mean that there are some people who are perfect while the rest of us have to suffer at the hands of our own demons.  Bondage and freedom are constantly bumping up against each other in the day to day, moment to moment, journey of life.  We choose life in one moment, and death in the next - heaven one minute and hell the next.

While most of us do not know what it's like to be oppressed by someone, we know what it's like to be oppressed by something.  I would venture to say that our very existence is threaded through with the constant tension between slavery and freedom.  So what do we do?

There is hope.  The beautiful part about stories of slavery is rescue.  With rescue comes grace unlimited.  If you've ever heard any stories of girls who are rescued from sex trafficking, it is a known fact that a lot of these girls find the temptation to go back to the brothel they came from very hard to resist.  They have been implanted with this idea that their worth is found in how they please men with sex.  When they are removed from that existence, they don't know how to function or live on their own.  Knowing this, organizations that are committed to combating sex trafficking set up safe houses for the rescued women.  In these safe places, the women are being restored.  They are being shown where there worth is truly found.  The voice of the liar is constantly whispering, "You need to go back, you need to go back.  How will you live without it?"  And some do go back.  But, they've found rescue and they know  where to go to find it again.  

As I journey through my own existence in the struggle between slavery and freedom, I believe that rescue has come.  Jesus claims that he is the way, the truth, and the life.  He makes sense to slaves like me.  Although I fall down over and over again, I believe deep in the core of my being that there is freedom to be grasped.  There will never be enough of it.  Although I choose slavery some days and freedom others, I believe rescue has come, is coming, and will always come.  Without God, my slavery is a dead end road.  I am doomed to an existence that tells me there is no hope.  I am left to beating myself up every time I give in to my desires to live in fantasy.  Since I am failing God, I have to become my own God, but I in fact become my own oppressor.  I become my judge and my teacher, and I set standards for myself that appear feasible but are nowhere within reach.  

Grace gives me the ability to acknowledge that I'm a fuck up, and to realize that my Rescue is always at arm's length.  It enables me to focus on attaining more freedom and experiencing more life.  It enables me to give myself grace in the moments that I fail my lofty standards, and believe in a God who became a slave unto death in order that I may receive life to the fullest.  

Today's action:  Today we will find a place to be alone for a few minutes.  We will stand tall, feet slightly apart, hands held open, and chest high.  We will say a prayer of thanks for rescue from oppression.  Then we will listen.